"Invasion of the Giant Bacteria"
LOGLINE: The evil Dr. Viper attacks Megakat Biochemical Labs with a multitude of giant bacteria monsters, which divide themselves each time they're hit.
© 2016 Kooshmeister
Based on the original teleplay written by Glenn Leopold.
DISCLAIMER: SWAT Kats: The Radical Squadron is a trademark of Hanna-Barbara. This author does not own the rights to the show, its episodes, or any of its characters, and this script is not meant for monetary use. I did it just for the heck of it.
EXT. BAYSIDE OIL REFINERY
Early evening. We open on an oil refinery located on the shores of Megakat Bay, across from the city which is visible in the distance. A sign reads: "KatCo Crude." The peaceful setting is disrupted when the refinery tanks suddenly explode one by one until the entire place is in flames. A two-engined purple fighter jet zooms through the smoke, a trio of Enforcer jets in pursuit.
ENFORCER PILOT (VO)
(filtered through radio)
There goes KatCo! That's the fifth one!
EXT. OVER THE OCEAN
The enemy fighter zooms across the bay, the Enforcers right on its tail, firing their lasers.
ENFORCER PILOT #2 (VO)
He's goin' for the Megakat Refinery next! We've gotta stop 'im!
The villain's jet turns around and flies back at them. It fires two missiles. One hits the Enforcer jet on the right, the second finds a target in the middle one. They crash smoking into the water.
The third Enforcer pilot turns in an effort to evade, but the purple jet zooms off in pursuit. Whoosh! A third missile is launched, hitting and destroying the Enforcer craft before it can escape. Its back end explodes and it spirals wildly out of control down into the water with a splash. Showing off, he does a barrel roll before turning and resuming his original course out across the bay.
EXT. OIL REFINERY
The Turbokat swings around the huge column of smoke. It zooms off across the open water to join the chase. In the cockpit are T-BONE and RAZOR. They don't look happy.
Does this wacko think he can he blow up every refinery in Megakat City?
Razor casts a glance back at the ruined refinery behind them.
Well, I'd say he's doing a pretty good job so far.
EXT. OVER THE OCEAN
They pass over what's left of the Enforcer jets. Smoke still rises from the floating debris.
And he shredded the Enforcers like an old scratchin' post! I don't see any survivors...
Guess it's up to us to kick this guy's tail!
Ahead, the enemy jet leaves the bay area and is now flying over the city. Gritting his teeth, T-Bone purshes the throttle forwards so he can gain on the other pilot.
EXT. SKIES OVER THE CITY
The Turbokat has three engines versus the other jet's two, so catching up to the other jet as they arrive over the city at the other end of the bay is no difficulty. The other pilot gives no indication of noticing or caring, however. His craft continues in a straight line, making no effort to evade them. The tops of tall buildings whizz by. In the Turbokat, T-Bone glances back at Razor.
Can you get a lock on him?
Working on it...
He bends forward over his targeting scope. There is a "beep" as he locks in on the enemy jet.
Locked and loaded, T-Bone! One Octopus Missile, on its way!
He launches an Octopus Missile. It whizzes through the air towards the other jet, which continues on its present course as before.
I don't believe it. The sucker doesn't even see comin'!
Suddenly, just as the Octopus Missile is mere feet away, the purple fighter veers left hard, allowing the missile to zoom past its underside and zoom ahead of it, hitting the side of a building. It explodes, leaving a big hole.
He suckered us!
This guy must have eyes in the back of his head!
No way, nobody's a better pilot than I am!
He punches the throttle, the faster Turbokat gaining on the other jet easily. He flips the Turbokat upside-down.
In the purple jet's cockpit, the pilot, MORBULUS, reacts without turning his head. He's a stocky, broad-shouldered kat with a neatly-trimmed beard, incongruously wearing a suit and tie. He's also wearing a pilot's helmet and flight goggles with red lenses in the front - and the back because he has a second pair of eyes in the back of his head, which is why he doesn't turn his head.
The upside-down Turbokat moves over him so they're canopy to canopy. T-Bone and Razor look down at him, and Morbulus looks up at them with his rear eyes.
Wow, look at that! He does have eyes in the back of his head!
You'll have to do better than that, SWAT Kats, to take Morbulus by surprise!
He suddenly pilots his jet downward, into the city. T-Bone grins at the challenge.
Four-eyes wants to play a little canyon tag, huh? Well, let's play.
He maneuvers the Turbokat, zooming down after Morbulus' jet.
EXT. ZOOMING BETWEEN THE BUILDINGS
The SWAT Kats are right on Morbulus' tail as both jets zoom through the skyscrapers, dangerously close to the traffic and citizens, who run for cover as the jets fly over. The sides of the buildings fly by.
This is a little dangerous...
(through gritted teeth)
No way this is guy is as good as me! I'm gonna chase him down if it's the last thing I do! Just get another volley of missiles ready!
Razor shakes his head, but consults his scope and targets Morbulus' jet once again.
This time I'll get ya!
Morbulus smirks over his shoulder at his pursuers, then dodges by turning sideways so his wings are vertical, letting the missile hit and destroy a parked semi truck.
Razor poundss his controls with his fist, beginning to share T-Bone's disdain and anger.
Crud! There's just no way to hit this guy!
He angrily begins loading up every single Octopus Missile in the Turbokat's compliment, intent on firing so many at once not even Morbulus can dodge them all. He's so fixated on looking at his screen that he isn't paying attention as Morbulus pilots his jet upwards, going higher above the buildings. T-Bone follows.
EXT. SKIES OVER THE CITY
City Hall is visible in the distance. The two jets are flying in its general direction, but not exactly at it. T-Bone frowns. Behind him, Razor is still absorbed in his work.
In a second!
Third time's the charm...
He fires a barrage of about twelve Octopus Missiles, which all fly at the enemy fighter ahead.
(finally looking up)
Only upon glancing up does Razor see the forest for the trees and see his mistake. Morbulus' rear set of eyes widen in fear as he sees so many missiles flying towards him and he banks left wildly... and the Octopus Missiles overshoot him completely and continue on towards City Hall.
INT. CITY HALL - MANX'S OFFICE
MAYOR MANX is on the phone. He looks very worried and his toupee is crooked as he paces back and forth in front of his desk, his expensive shoes threatening to wear a hole in his even more expensive carpet. In one hand, he holds a fountain pen.
Oh, Callie, it's just so awful. Our entire oil supply is going up in smoke thanks to that maniac.
Relax, Mayor, the SWAT Kats are handling him even as we speak.
Manx looks at a haphazardly strewn collection of papers covered in ink spatters and barely legible writing.
I can't concentrate on writing my speech for tomorrow's park dedication.
He shakes the pen in his hand, annoyed.
And this blasted pen isn't--
He's cut off as the entire building shakes from an unseen impact (the missiles hitting). An enormous jointed metal claw pierces through the wall of the office, startling him. He drops the phone as the pen spasms, spewing black ink everywhere, staining his suit. Dropping, it he grabs the phone and wails into it.
--and I'm being attacked! Callie! Save me!
EXT. CITY HALL
City Hall now has a pull compliment of Octopus Missiles bristling imbedded into its sides, looking like some kind of angry inverted porcupine with a clock.
EXT. SKIES OVER THE SKY
Morbulus' jet zips in and out of the city before turning and heading back out over the bay again.
EXT. OVER THE OCEAN
The villain's jet heads towards the Megakat Refinery, the only one he hasn't blown up yet. The SWAT Kats are still pursuing him, but at a more respectful distance.
Great! He's headed right for another refinery!
I'm out of ideas, buddy. How 'bout you?
I got a plan that might work.
He flies the Turbokat down into a cloud bank.
Morbulus watches them go with his rear eyes from his own cockpit.
Ha! Those SWAT Wimps gave up.
He narrows his front eyes as he sights the refinery ahead.
Now to give the Megakat Refinery a taste of my Morbulus Missiles!
The refinery grows ever nearer. He grins.
The city will regret not paying me that ransom!
He flicks a switch and his targeting computer locks in on the facility, his thumb hovering menacingly over the firing button.
Underneath him, the Turbokat emerges from the clouds. It moves under his jet as it ever nearer to the refinery. He cannot see them. T-Bone glares up at the bottom of the other jet.
Let's see if you've got eyes under your head, punk.
(over his shoulder)
Okay, Razor. Now!
A Cookie-Cutter should do the trick.
He launches a Cookie-Cutter Missile. Like the Octopus Missile, it resembles an ordinary missile until the sides fall away and a razor-edged metal circle unfolds and magnetically attaches itself to the underside of the other jet. The circle then begins rotating rapidly until it's spinning fast enough to bite through metal, and begins to cut through up into the cockpit
Morbulus' finger remains poised over the trigger but he hesitates, confused.
Huh? What the--?!
Suddenly he drops down, through the bottom of the cockpit and right out of the aircraft, still sitting strapped into his seat and holding the steering stick.
All four eyes widened in uncomprehending surprise, Morbulus screams as he begins falling towards the water far below, discarding the steering stick and fumbling for the button that will activate his parachute.
The Sky Claw - big metal claw on the end of a very long cable - shoots out from beneath the Turbokat and grabbed the back of his seat with him still strapped into it, halting his descent suddenly. The Cookie-Cutter Missile and the circular section of metal it'd cut free land in the water with a distant splash.
T-Bone puts the Turbokat into VTOL mode and hovers there with Morbulus swnging beneath them.
Looks like we hooked a big one.
Yeah! He's a keeper!
Suddenly, Razor looks ahead and his eyes widen. He points offscreen.
Oh, no! T-Bone, look!
T-Bone turns and reacts to:
EXT. MEGAKAT REFINERY - DAY
A large-scale oil refinery like the KatCo one earlier. Morbulus' pilotless jet dives towards it. A group of Enforcer sedans (police cruisers used by the Enforcers) are driving towards it followed by Callie Briggs' own dark green sedan. They all skid to a halt as the jet hits nose-first and the refinery goes up in a monumental explosion that can be seen for miles. Debris rains in all directions.
The Turbokat approaches with Morbulus still hanging beneath.
Below them, Morbulus, still strapped into his seat, cheers.
Yeah! Burn, baby, burn!
Still laughing, he unbuckles himself and falls from his seat and into the water below. Unsuspecting, the two SWAT Kats are more worried about the consequences of today's adventure as T-Bone pilots the Turbokat towards the shore. Nobody onshore noticed Morbulus' dive, either, because they were too busy watching the explosion. Underwater, Morbulus starts taking his clothes off...
T-Bone flies the Turbokat towards the shore, still in hover mode. He opens the canopy so he and Razor can converse with CALLIE BRIGGS, who approaches with COMMANDER FERAL and several ENFORCER COMMANDOS. The refinery blazes spectacularly behind them.
You hotshot jerks!
He turns and points at the burning destruction that used to be the Megakat Refinery.
You've destroyed the last refinery in the city!
Calm down, Feral. We got your guy.
He releases the Sky Claw, and Morbulus' empty seat thuds into the sand at Feral and Callie's feet.
So where is he?
T-Bone is annoyed.
What are you talkin' about?
T-Bone leans over and looks down, as does Razor. T-Bone's annoyance quickly turns to confusion.
Crud! He must've unbuckled himself!
You two are going to pay dearly for this!
T-Bone is suddenly overcome with the understandable desire to bug out of there as fast as he can. He starts talking very fast.
Sorry, Feral, but I think Razor left something on the stove. Gotta run.
Seeya, Ms. Briggs, sorry we didn't have time to chat!
He closes the canopy.
Come back here!
The Turbokat rises up, the backwash blowing Callie's hair around and causing Feral's greatcoat to billow about his large frame. It rises up, then rockets off into the distance.
One of these days I'm going to get those two.
Callie attempts to mediate.
At least they stopped Morbulus, Commander. The refineries can be rebuilt.
Feral glares at her.
At what cost? With the Megakat Refinery destroyed, Manx may as well have paid this maniac for all the money this is going to cost Megakat City!
One of the commandos suddenly points offscreen.
Commander Feral, look out there!
They look over, following his finger. What appears to be a body (Morbulus) is floating face-down in the water. Two of the commandos wade into the water, grab it and haul it ashore as Feral and Callie hurry over.
Be careful! He could still be dangerous!
Yeah, if he was still here...
Callie gawks down at what they've pulled ashore: empty clothes put together to make it look like someone is still in them! Commando #2 holds up Morbulus' empty helmet.
It's just his clothes, sir.
I can see that!
He's naked somwhere!
Feral whirls to Callie, clenching his fists and gritting his teeth.
If they'd held Morbulus until we arrived, that four-eyed freak would be in cuffs right now!
They hear the sound of approaching sirens and vehicle engines, turning. Fire engines along with some news vans drive up. Kat's Eye News' star field reporter ANN GORA gets out along with her cameraman, JONNY K., and several other REPORTERS. They stampede down the beach towards them. FIREMEN pile out of their trucks and begin unspooling their hoses to begin the unenviable task of attempting to douse the flames of the refinery.
(pointing to himself)
I'll handle the press, Briggs.
He walks to meet the gaggle of microphones, camera lenses and flashing lights thrust into his face. The commandos follow him and flank him like bodyguards.
Commander Feral, is this the end of the "refinery reign of terror?"
In a manner of speaking...
Jonny and other cameramen turn their video cameras towards the burning refinery, then back to Feral. The reporters continue eagerly pressing. A very short ORANGE-HAIRED REPORTER wearing a polka-dotted tie stands on his tip toes to ensure his microphone reaches Feral's face.
What about Morbulus? Do you have him in custody?
A taller BLACK-HAIRED REPORTER is next.
Yeah, Commander, do you have this wacko or what?
(clears his throat)
Ahem, well, due to the valiant efforts of my Enforcers... and some minor assistance from the SWAT Kats... the evildoer known as Morbulus won't be destroying any more refineries any time soon.
A WHITE-HAIRED REPORTER wearing purple-tinted glasses shoves through the crowd suddenly.
You mean because this was the last one!
Who said that?!
He scans the crowd. The reporter makes a sound and vanishes back into the anonymity of the group.
What about Morbulus?
Yeah, where is he? And what about the SWAT Kats? Where were they in all this?
We pull back as the talking and arguing goes on as Feral is bombarded with questions. Callie is left alone. She loosens her tie a bit and sighs, staring down at Morbulus' empty clothing.
I just hope that's the last we'll see of Morbulus.
We pull back further and pan right to:
EXT. SEWER DRAIN PIPE
The sewer empties into the bay via a large drain pipe. Morbulus surfaces from the water. Far from naked, he swims ashore in a sleeveless undershirt and a pair of boxer shorts. He climbs inside the pipe. He looks at the burning refinery in the distance and the lights of all the Enforcer vehicles and fire trucks.
I guess you could say I gave them the strip! No way I'm gonna see the inside of a prison cell!
He thumps his chest triumphantly. He suddenly hears a hiss echoing in the pipe behind him. Using his rear eyes, he sees a pair of glowing yellow eyes in the darkness. A rasping voice issues forth.
I'll put you to much better ussse than that!
EXT. SALVAGE YARD - DAY
The Turbokat flies overhead, the secret panel in the ground opening to allow the jet to enter the secret SWAT Kats' secret hangar located underneath the salvage yard.
INT. HANGAR - DAY
After the Turbokat rises up into the main area of the hangar on its hydraulic platform. T-Bone pops the canopy, and both SWAT Kats hop out, taking off their helmets. Neither is in a particularly celebratory mood.
That didn't go too well...
Understatement of the year, right there.
They walk to their lockers, tossing their helmets inside. They remove their black masks and change clothes from their flight suits to mechanics' coveralls. T-Bone is now CHANCE FURLONG, and Razor is now JAKE CLAWSON.
We destroyed half the city trying to catch this guy and he still gets away from us.
C'mon, let's head back up to the greasepit and get a couple cans of milk
They walk towards a ladder that leads upwards, and begin to climb.
INT. GARAGE - LIVING ROOM
They enter what can charitably be called the living room. Jake picks up the remote control for the TV but doesn't turn it on yet. Chance gets a couple of milk cans from the fridge, tossing one to Jake as he walks over. Jake catches it in his free hand.
Gonna see what they have to say about it on the news.
Nothing good, probably. Personally, I'd give us a three outta ten...
Are you gonna mope like this all night?
Chance's confidence is returning.
So that guy got away. Big deal. We at least kicked his tail and gave 'im somethin' to think about before he crawled off to hide under whatever rock he crawled out of!
He puts a beefy army around Jake's shoulders, hugging his buddy close.
He'll think twice before he tries tanglin' with the SWAT Kats again, huh?
I guess you're right. Anyway, let's see what Kat's Eye News has to say about it.
He turns on an older model TV with the seemingly obligatory clothes hanger antenna. He flips through the channels until he catches sight of Commander Feral. It's currently muted. The Kat's Eye News logo is superimposed in the lower corner of the screen. In the background, the firefighting crews can be seen attempting to douse the flames of the still-burning refinery. Flashing intermittently is "Recorded Earlier."
Hey, there's Feral. And he looks like he hasn't hit the litterbox in a week!
Chance guffaws. Jake shakes his head and turns the volume up. The reporter with orange hair is the one interviewing Feral. He faces the camera while Feral looms behind him, looking impatient.
I'm here with Commander Feral, who says that the so-called "refinery reign of terror" is over at last.
Turning, he holds his microphone out to Feral, who has to bend down slightly to talk into it.
The villain known as Morbulus was defeated by the SWAT Kats, but at great cost. They destroyed the Megakat Refinery and even caused damage to City Hall!
And what about Morbulus? The question on everyone's mind is do you have him in custody?
Ha! Due to the interference of the SWAT Kats, this is all we have of Morbulus at the moment!
He holds up Morbulus' empty clothes for emphasis.
Chance growls, squeezing his unopened milk can. Beside him, Jake looks afraid that his friend will give himself an aneurysm or something.
Why, that lousy...
Chance, calm down.
Feral's rant continues unabated.
No one asked for their help, and they allowed a dangerous criminal to escape! Even if they mean well, surely they could be more careful! But they're aren't! They're reckless and irresponsible, and--
He's cut off as Chance hurls his can at the TV screen. The force of the impact shatters it. Jake, shocked, covers his eyes as sparks and little bits of glass fly everywhere. When Jake uncovers his eyes, the TV has a big hole where the screen used to be. Thin tendrils of smoke snake up out of it.
Chance! What in the heck did you do that for?
Sorry about that, Jake. I... just lost it there for a second. That jerk Feral really ticks me off sometimes.
Well, the feeling's mutual I'm sure.
Jake sighs, tossing the now useless remote aside.
Well, Morbulus is gone, and so's the TV.
Aw, can't you fix it, buddy?
I can try. But it'll take a while.
A smirk comes over Jake's features. He takes on an air of casual, feigned sadness.
Too bad. There was gonna be an all-night Scaredy-Kat marathon on tonight. Darn shame.
Chance looks stunned and disappointed.
EXT. THE DEAD FOREST
Located deep in the heart of Megakat Swamp, the Dead Forest is a nasty, muddy, slimy, revolting place. Alligators, snakes, rats and other unpleasant creatures slither around in the fog-enshrouded wasteland. Close in on a gigantic, twisted tree, with windows through which light can be seen shining.
INT. DR. VIPER'S LAB
Morbulus (still in his underwear) is with DR. VIPER. He's short, thin and hunched-over with green and bluish green striped fur and crazy black spiked hair, naked save for a white lab coat that is at least three sizes too large for his thin frame. A long reptilian tail moves restlessly behind him. They're watching the same news report that Chance and Jake were, on a TV set suspended above Viper's worktable. Onscreen, Commander Feral is wringing his swagger stick as he talks.
..and then when I finally get my hands on those two, I'm gonna--
The reporter is suddenly desperate to end the Commander's rant as quickly as possible.
Uh, sorry, Commander, but we've run out of time. This is Kat's Eye News, live from the Megakat Refinery.
The camera view wobbles a bit, and Feral pushes past the reporter and takes a few threatening steps towards who whoever is filming.
Hey! Come back here, I'm not done yet...!
The image of Feral's enormous hand reaching for the camera freezes and pulls back to occupy the upper righthand corner of a news studio where a handsome male NEWSCASTER sits behind a desk.
That was recorded earlier at the scene of the Megakat Refinery. The rest of our own Commander Feral's rant against the SWAT Kats was... unfit for broadcast.
Dr. Viper clicks off the TV using a remote control. He cackles and sets it aside.
It ssseems we agree with Commander Feral on one thing, don't we, Morbulusss? Thossse SWAT Katsss are quite a bother, aren't they?
Yeah. They made me a laughingstock today. I'd sure like to pound their smug faces in!
He punches his fist into his open palm to illustrate. Viper doesn't reply. After a short pause, Morbulus looks over the worktable. It is covered with a variety of beakers, flasks and retorts, all filled with various insidious concoctions bubbling over bunsen burners. He picks up a flask from the table, examining it.
Pretty impressive setup ya got here, Doc. Looks like you've got everything a mad scientist could ever need right here.
Everything except for... Katalyssst 99!
Katalyst 99? What's that?
A rare biochemical compound I require. It can only be found in Megakat Biochemical Labsss.
Good luck. That place is supposed to be impenetrable.
Viper walks over and grabs the flask from Morbulus' hands, making him jump.
Ah, we sssee "eye to eye," Morbulusss.
Morbulus scowls, not appreciating the pun, as Viper walks back to his worktable.
What? You've got a plan for gettin' in?
You might sssay that.
Setting the flask down, Viper picks up a small glass dish containing a purple liquid. Using an eyedropper, Viper sucks all of the liquid up, then, smirking, he turns and walked back over to Morbulus. Morbulus frowns and backs up a bit. He raises an arm as though to shove him away.
And you're going to help me!
Morbulus blinks and watches, first in agitation and then in shock as the drop of liquid fizzes up and his whole arm instantly starts to change, softening and becoming thick, purple and gooey. He backs up as the bubbling purple goo spreads over his frame like a disease.
(in sick pleasure)
Morbulus' ghastly transformation continues. In seconds everything but his head has changed, transformed into the purple vileness Viper put on him.
What did you do to me?!
I'm sssimply turning you into my new mutant bacteria monssster!
We cut away from Morbulus as his transformation continues offscreen. We see the frightening and ever-changing shadows being cast over Dr. Viper and the wall behind him. It grows bigger and bigger as Viper rubs his hands together fiendishly. He points.
Yesss, my friend! You're hungry, aren't you? I can tell!
From offscreen, Morbulus' voice deepens and his words devolve into inarticulate roaring.
Well, don't worry, I'll feed you! Sssoon, yesss... very sssoon!
Another roar bellows forth.
With your help, I'll sssoon have Katalyssst 99 in my coilsss, and the power to permanently change thisss foul city into sssomething truly beautiful... my Megassswamp City!
EXT. THE DEAD FOREST
Dr. Viper's high-pitched, wicked laughter carries out over the swamp.